Saturday, September 11, 2010

The Day Our World Changed 9/11/2001

This was a day that our life as we knew it ended. Our whole beings were shook to the core the day we realized that we were not "safe". We were made aware that there was indeed this much hate in the world. More hate than most of us could ever think possible.
And that hate was aimed at our nation. The nation we were so proud of. Our God was literally under attack. And that hate washed over us and made us think of things we possibly had never thought of before. Anger, hate, helplessness, fear, pain, thoughts of the most horrific revenge.

As we watched over and over that day, the planes slamming into the buildings, and watched it live, people throwing themselves from the windows to their death. The fear of burning to death, sent them to a quicker release from fear and pain. The we stopped thinking and we were numb as the media kept these pictures in our thoughts. I cannot imagine how those people at ground zero were coping with the terror. Watching and waiting and looking for loved ones that would never come home.

Our nation stood up that day together to pick up the pieces and somehow go on with our lives. We have tried to understand how someone could hate us so. We had to look at ourselves with different eyes to see how we got here. If somehow it was our fault.
Of course it is not our fault that people Hate.
We had to learn hard lessons on diversity and what that really means.The "Constitution of the United States" was written for every citizen without prejudice of their beliefs. "Our Nation under God indivisible with liberty and justice for all" means just that.

We must never forget the day America was attacked. We must remember those that died because of hate. Learn that we have to be diligent in watching out for those that would cause us harm.
And remember that hate breeds hate and it has to stop with us. I pray that God will take hate from our hearts and let there be peace.

Monday, September 6, 2010

Autistic Teen Finds Inner Voice

I found this on Face book today. I am so happy for this young girl and her family. We have our Noah and he is extremely autistic. He has most all the same symptoms as this young girl. We have often said that we believe much of Noah's melt downs are the result of him not being able to communicate with us. He seemed a little better once he was able to show us what he wants. But now that isn't working either. His reactions to what goes on around him are unacceptable in society. His fits that a normal child would have end up hurting him and others around him. He lashes out with head banging and hitting, if he can't hit you, he hits himself. In fact most of his tirades are against himself. In the course of one of these fits, he lashes out at anyone close. So if it is in the car, his brothers and baby sister are the victims. If you are trying to calm him so that he doesn't hurt himself or others, then you are the victim. Today, my arms are covered with scratches and bruises where he held my harms and pinched me with his fingernails. Of course, his ribs have to hurt. He beats himself in the ribs. They must be so tender to the touch. I don't think he feels the pain the same way we do.

This young girl, Carly, has put into words what we always want to know. Why do you do this? Sensory overload is basically the reason. Everything effects them sensory wise. And they are trying to stop that. The senses as we know them, mainly bring us pleasure. Like music, laughter, the wind blowing through the trees. Sunshine on our faces, the smell of a brand new morning. For Autistic children, the breeze that feels that good to us might feel like knives cutting their skin. And all they do to try and make that stop.

I think I understand to an extent. I have fibromyalgia. Sometimes my hair hurts. And the wind blowing across my skin makes me want to scream. My clothes have to fit me a certain way. Sometimes I change clothes several times a day. And I will find something that is comfortable finally. It might be the same thing I tried yesterday and it didn't work. Loud noises make me insane. Loud noise physically hurts me. And the only difference between  Noah and myself, is that my mind works differently. I know how to channel the appropriate reaction. I can communicate to those around me. I hurt, leave me alone. I can tell them the music is too loud. I can speak for myself. I may not understand why, but I understand what.

Carly tell us that she feels she is on fire. She says that her head fills like exploding and letting everything out.
I am so so happy for her and her family. Hopefully we will be able to learn from her the What. Scientist and Doctors could learn what is going on, and then they can come up with the why. Our hope is one day, that they can develop a way to treat the mind and take away the pain.

Wednesday, September 1, 2010

First Day Back At School

 Today was my first day back and I am tired. But I enjoyed it so much. I do love working with these kids and I will be in this classroom for 6 weeks. They are so special. It is the extremely handicapped class and each student is awesome in their own way.

Some are in wheel chairs, most cannot speak or even feed themselves, but that is not Who they are. That is just the body that they were given. They will break your heart because you wish so much better for them. At the same time, they give us so much back. Most of them are basically non verbal, and cannot tell you with words what they want or need. They speak with their hearts and they have so much to say. Also, you do not need words when you hear their laughter. The sound grabs your heart and it doesn't let go.You know that in that minute, they are truly happy.

Each child has their own personality. And although they are mostly happy and smiling, you know when they are upset or having a very bad day. When they cry and we don't know why, we feel so sad for them. Just like everyone else, they need love and hugs and encouragement. The smallest acknowledgment will light up their faces.

The families of these children have a hard life. I believe it is always 1 step forward and 3 steps back on a regular basis. Sharing and trusting us with the care of their babies is not an easy thing to do. I would like the parents to know that Giving them a feeling of  happiness, comfort and contentment  while I am caring for them is my goal. Treating them with dignity and respect is a priority. I hope at the end of the day, these special angels know how much they are loved and I have made a difference in their lives.

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